𝖁𝖊𝖓𝖚𝖘𝖎𝖆𝖓𝕵𝖔𝖓𝖊𝖑

As we enter Women’s History Month, I find myself disheartened by the continued willingness of some women to settle for less in the pursuit of broken promithis, particularly in the year 2024. Recently I’ve been getting into Netflix reality TV which has been an emotional rollercoaster, driven by the lack of compelling series despite the ample subscriptions I already pay for. Among these, Love is Blind has garnered much attention over the years. However, I struggle to sit through scenes where women seemingly beg for validation. This sentiment echoes my longstanding hate for shows like The Bachelor, or Flavor Of Love, until the arrival of New York, an iconic figure who changed the game for women who play the game well.

For far too long, women have fallen prey to unrealistic expectations in their pursuit of love. Growing up, I witnessed this phenomenon, which has left me somewhat cynical. My patience for men and their shortcomings—be it in morality, empathy, honesty, safety, or common sense—is thin. It frustrates me to see individuals perform insincerely in relationships. Many women are guilty of coming on too strong, burdening potential partners with their desperate need for love. In my years of dating, I’ve made nearly every man feel replaceable. Perhaps it’s due to my heavy Gemini influence, but I”ve often I’ve been ready to move on before checkout. Now engaged to a fellow Gemini, I feel I possess some expertise in marriage and relationships from both perspectives.

Watching this season with AD has been enjoyable, particularly due to the representation of women like me on television. AD, a stunning black woman with a background as an NBA cheerleader, seemingly harbors unrealistic expectations of love, likely shaped by her father’s absence and her mother’s experiences. Clay, her love interest, displays numerous red flags, leaving me doubtful of him overcoming his insecurities. Because of this, I did not believe a word he has said ALL season. While I acknowledge the scripted nature of reality TV, the other cast members we’re absolutely DEADASS.

One of the biggest pitfalls for women is their NEED for hopeless romanticism. Throughout history, we’ve seen many women married to powerful or even unattractive men, often enduring infidelity. He’s Just Not That Into You, a favorite chick flick of mine, illustrates how women often choose men who are indifferent towards them, leading to eventual heartbreak. This theme recently played out in the life of TikTok creator Reesa Teesa, who clung to a relationship despite being repeatedly deceived, only to face his version of a grand finale.

It’s disheartening to witness women squander their love and time on unworthy partners. While I’ve made mistakes in the past, it’s time to draw a line. How many times will we allow men to disrespect us, exploit us, or worse, abuse us? It’s 2024—time to guard our hearts fiercely. While I advocate for female empowerment and pussy power, but investing all your love in someone who lacks essential qualities of a partner—such as discipline, compassion, reliability, cooperation, optimism, confidence, kindness, ambition, fairness, openness, honesty, generosity, persistence, and decisiveness—is simply not worth it.

Watching AD endure cycles of rejection was difficult. Clay’s charming facade couldn’t hide his true intentions. When he remarked that their relationship was “on brand,” it was evident he would ultimately embarrass her, as his parents likely foresaw. Although it was cringe to witness how dishonest Clay was up until it was his moment to say if he would love to marry AD, I’m so happy that he did not hold her hostage in the relationship. Thankfully, Clay had the integrity to let her go, because keeping a woman around until impregnation should be criminal. It’s unfortunate that emotional intelligence often takes a backseat when faced with a handsome man. But true love is rooted in mutual respect and consideration, not mere appearances or longevity.

I’m sorry but I have to say it, “ Okay body” isn’t a compliment you are being sexualized. Unless you are speaking to someone you are creating NSFW content with, lace up your sneakers and run my sista. That is not someone that is genuinely INTO you, and there are Many other things that will display that he’s not into you, so it’s up to you to detach and align with people who are interested in real partnership.

Partnership is an enriching experience because it demonstrates that one is not just heard, but also embraced by another individual. However, it’s important to acknowledge that depending on the person, being embraced can sometimes serve as more of an ego boost than a genuine exchange of love. A relationship where one’s ego is constantly stroked is not authentic; it’s merely a superficial engagement. When seeking a partner, it’s essential to be intentional about the energy they bring into your life and how it influences yours. Both parties are responsible for maintaining mindfulness in the relationship. This requires asking meaningful questions that lead to positive outcomes.

Unfortunately, throughout this period, neither AD nor Clay engaged in genuine communication that could have fostered growth. Instead, they exhibited signs of insecurity, immaturity, and predatory behavior. AD pursued Clay for his voice, appearance, and desperation, while Clay took advantage of AD’s body, delusions, and willingness to stroke every part of his … EGO, get your mind out of the gutter. This behavior is unacceptable. Often, women find themselves drawn to men who are clearly lacking in maturity because we can only connect with others at the level you’re at.

If you’re dating someone who lacks ambition , most likely you do too.

If you’re dating someone intelligent, you are intelligent as well.

Notice how I only highlighted things that influences the mental?

Walk with me my sista.

To any woman currently dating a man who doesn’t meet her standards, my advice is simple: keep dating. Marriage isn’t the ultimate goal and there’s no rush, and you need not tether your life to someone like Clay. Always prioritize qualities over looks. Personally, watching couples where one partner becomes disabled has reshaped my perspective on love. It’s taught me that love is about mutual service—supporting each other not just financially, but mentally, physically, and emotionally.

As of today many American’s are PISSED at this grand finale because AD really ignored every red flag up until Clay unloaded his grand finale on her. It didn’t stop there because after giving her the news, he approached her after, proceeded to kiss and hug her. Reports are also saying that she is STILL hanging out with him casually. There’s absolutely NO amount of money that you could pay me for this level of desperado.